This Year’s Camping Trip


I’ll start with the fact that there was a heat wave in my hometown, and the weather wasn’t much of a difference where we stayed. Also, I had to pet sit mom’s Pomeranian. The morning we left, something, bug-like, flew into the truck. I freaked, and the boys looked for it. Of course, they didn’t find it.


The water had receded to the tree that used to be under it. This is where we camped.


While we waited under the tree for the rest of the crew, we began to learn, quickly, that these things are crucial:

1 the shade of a tree
2 a spray bottle filled with cool water
3 sunscreen. lots and lots of sunscreen.
4 plenty of water and gatoraid

Thankfully, we had all four.

We also learned that the shade of the tree was 90% cooler than the tarp tent the guys put up. This thing was huge, hot, and filled with bugs during dinner time.


We learned that, no matter how cold and refreshing, alcohol is the drink of the idiots when it is 103 in the shade.
We learned that we have to bring the phone charger.
That the rest of the group really wanted my squirt bottle and sharing it got stupid.
That there is sunscreen for face and body. Put body on your face, and it will soon be in your eyes. All day.
That filling a large cooler, that has a spout, with clean ice and clean drinking water will cut down on replacing bottles in the cooler. And trips to the store.
We learned that we, also, forgot the wine for the berry/champagne mixture. And we forgot the rio ruby red for the vodka.
We learned that block ice is way better in the food cooler, than cubes. That prepping the foid and keeping them in waterproof packaging i.e. foil in double Ziploc, Tupperware or even canning jars. Canning meals is a great idea, also.
That dead fish, wrapped in plastic, should not be in the drink . That bread will get moist and mildew, immediately.
I thought about using rice or the little chingas that come in your vitamins that absorb the moisture. That salt makes an awsome oil absorber and grit for scrubbing you cast iron.
That the bug (the flying cockroach, which was the biggest they had ever seen) came out and got on me. Crawled down my inner thigh with it gripping, disgusting, long legs while I was making the bed.
That, just because you have a futon, doesn’t mean it will be comfortable in the bed of the truck. That the Pom could swim and flies really piss the dog of.


That the stars, satellites and whatever the hell that was, looked just beautiful when the kids finally shut off the lantern. Oh wait. That was us. No, they were not our kids. That it’s so much nicer to pee off the side of the truck in the middle of the night. And that a bucket, lined with a trash bag is better than hiking to the toilets or squatting in the wild. At least we remembered the toilet paper and wipes. We got the store brand that came with three packages, because no one else thinks to bring them and want to use yours all weekend.


That grass hoppers can grow to be quite large. That I really hate bugs while camping.

All in all, we learned that we are older and a little bit more particular. That the next trip will be in the Spring or Fall. We will be looking for a trailer, on the cheap, to fix up. That we will bring music. Any music that will drown out the crap the kids were listening to.



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